misslizzers (misslizzers) wrote,

F-ing advertisements

So, I was innocently sitting back to write an email on my hotmail account, when I was distracted by a stooopid ad on the sidebar of my computer. Fucking hotmail. Here it goes: "805,345 blue-eyed women at American singles and counting!" What the fuck does that mean? Does it mean they're going to go out with you? Does it mean they're somehow better than everybody else? Don't get me wrong, several girls I know, and apparently 805,345 other people, have very beautiful eyes, but God! Wouldn't it piss you off if that was the only reason somebody was interested in you??? Apparently, American singles is NOT the dating site for black people. Or Asians, Puerto Ricans, Samoans, etc. How bloody American of them. I could just spit.

Another stupid ad, now that I think about it. Saw it on my way home from Boston the other day. "When winter lasts 9 months, the coffee better be good." Ok, I'll go along with that. But the brand name was New England Coffee. I think when winter lasts 9 months you have a pretty tough time growing ANY coffee. Why can't they just be honest and tell us what starving migrant workers they stole it from?

Ok, now I'm going to totally rip off Hugh's LJ quiz. And I'm doing it on a ujournal that no one reads, so it just might be the perfect crime.

Answer the questions using Bjork song titles:

Are you female or male? Bigtime sensuality
Describe yourself: Violently happy
How do some people feel about you? Pagan poetry
How do you feel about yourself? I go humble
Describe your ex-boyfriend: Sod off
Describe your current boyfriend: Venus as a boy
Where do you want to be? In the musicals
What do you want to be? Hunter
Describe how you live: Like someone in love
Share a few words of wisdom: It's not up to you

Ok, ditto, with the help of her good friend Thom Yorke:

Are you female or male? vegetable
Describe yourself: Bullet proof . . . I wish I was
How do some people feel about you? Paranoid android
How do you feel about yourself? Let down
Describe your ex-boyfriend: Creep
Describe your current boyfriend: Amnesiac
Where do you want to be? Sail to the moon
What do you want to be? A punchup at a wedding
Describe how you live: How do you?
Share a few words of wisdom: Anyone can play guitar
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